Because I was invited and felt it would be rude not to go, I took my youngest sister to a New Year’s party given by her friend. (The mother is our yoga instructor and invited us.) The family throws the party every year, so the house was full.
I don’t particularly like parties. I’m very Mr. Darcy in that I’m uncomfortable approaching new people. I did make a little conversation with people over the buffet table, mostly about recipes. The hardest part of the night for me was when the dancing commenced. The house was rather small, but the living room had wood floor and stereo system so that it was easily transformed into a dance floor. I love to dance. But I’d rather be at home where no one is watching. Of course, I started to remember that I didn’t want to be afraid of being judged anymore, so I went out and danced. Sometimes I closed my eyes and pretended that I was alone, but it got crowded and no one was really paying attention to me anyway. It became pretty fun. I didn’t stay on the floor the whole time, though.
I normally wouldn’t have chosen to go to a party for New Year. I would have preferred to sit at home and watch Times Square on TV with a cup of hot cocoa. I mainly went because my sister has gone to the party in years past but was never able to stay through to the New Year. Since I was invited I told her that I’d stay as long as she wanted. (Which meant that at 2 in the morning she was on the roof with her friends and I had to call her down.) She was happy and I actually enjoyed myself. I didn’t completely break out of my shell but it was a great step towards my goal of not being afraid to be myself and not being afraid of being judged in order to be in control of my life and my happiness.
The best part for me was when everyone made a Whoville circle at midnight and tried to sing Alud Lang Syne. Everyone knows that one verse, but after that we all kind of just sang nonsense. I myself was very Zooey Deschanel: AND I DON’T KNOW THE WWWOORRRRRDSS ~ !
I hope we get invited again next year.